Fool: A Novel

By Christopher Moore

“Hilarious, constantly artistic, it is a ebook for all, in particular uptight English lecturers, bardolaters, and ministerial students.”
Dallas Morning News

Fool—the bawdy and outrageous New York Times bestseller from the unstoppable Christopher Moore—is a hilarious new tackle William Shakespeare’s King Lear…as visible throughout the eyes of the silly liege’s clownish jester, Pocket. A rousing story of “gratuitous shagging, homicide, spanking, maiming, treason, and heretofore unexplored heights of vulgarity and profanity,” Fool joins Moore’s personal Lamb, Fluke, The Stupidest Angel, and You Suck! as glossy masterworks of satiric wit and sublimely twisted genius, prompting Carl Hiassen to claim Christopher Moore “a very ailing guy, within the absolute best experience of the word.”

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Stick with Regan. The plan is as prior to. ” “No, it’s now not. We don’t even comprehend who her enemy is, Albany or France. ” “Aye, yet your motion might be a similar. ” “I’d provide a month’s wages to be at the back of the blade that slays that bastard Edmund. ” on the point out of his son, Gloucester began wailing back. “Drown me! i'm going to endure not more! provide me your sword that i could run upon it and finish my disgrace and distress! ” “Sorry,” I acknowledged to Curan. “He’s been just a little a weepy little Nancy to be round due to the fact that they ripped his eyes out.

My daughters wouldn’t have you ever. You didn’t have them. ” “Oh, I did, on my black heart’s blood, I did. And while it first began, each one of them could shout Father whilst she got here. i'm wondering why. Oh certain, nuncle, I did certainly. they usually sought after you to know—that’s why they accused me ahead of you. Oh sure, I bonked them either. ” “No,” wailed Lear. “Me, too,” stated Drool, with a superb juicy grin. “Beggin’ your pardon,” he quick further. “But now not this present day? ” requested one of many guards. “Right? ” “No, no longer this present day, you bloody nitwit.

You recognize her weak point for scoundrels, Oswald. Did you your self now not pimp your woman to Edmund? ” “I didn't. I in simple terms brought a message. And Edmund is inheritor to an earldom. ” “Just this bloody week he's. And don’t act as though you don’t comprehend what was once in that message. i've got the ability, Oswald, given me by means of 3 witches within the nice Birnam wooden, to place a spell upon your woman so she is going to adore and wish you. ” Oswald laughed, no longer whatever he did usually. His face was once no longer healthy for it and he gave the impression of he had anything stuck in his again enamel.

Then she laughed. It used to be unhappy laughter, as though it have been held decades after which let loose in nearly a sob, yet she used to be giggling and that i was once careworn. “I’m sorry, mistress—” “No, no, no, don’t be sorry. Don’t you dare be sorry, boy. ” “I’m no longer. I won’t be. ” “What is your identify? ” “Pocket, mum. ” “Pocket,” she repeated, and she or he laughed a few extra. “You’ve spilled my ale, Pocket. ” “Aye, mum. Shall I fetch you a few extra? ” “If you don’t wish the honour of my bloody godliness burning us either down, you larger had, hadn’t you, pal Pocket?

No, no longer at the present time, you bloody nitwit. this day I killed them. ” The French marched overland from the southeast and sailed ships up the Thames from the east. The lords of Surrey at the south confirmed no resistance and because Dover lay within the County of Kent, the forces of the banished earl not just provided no resistance, yet joined the French within the attack on London. They’d marched and sailed throughout England with no firing a unmarried bolt or wasting a unmarried guy. From the White Tower the guards may perhaps see the fires of the French drawing an outstanding orange crescent within the evening that illuminated the sky to the east and south.

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